Selfish Choices
by Teacher Yumi
Summary: Sachiko decided to continue with her life without Yumi. Years after their break up, they meet again and Sachiko had to face the bitter consequences of her selfish choices. She realized the mistake she made and wanted to make amends. But how will she do this when the woman she loves is about to be married?
1. Prologue

Selfish Choices

* * *

><p>Disclaimer: I don't own Maria-Sama Ga Miteru or any of its characters. Credits to the author.<p>

Summary: Sachiko decided to continue with her life without Yumi. Years after their break up, they meet again and Sachiko had to face the bitter consequences of her selfish choices. She realized the mistake she made and wanted to make amends. But how will she do this when the woman she loves is about to be married?

A/N: My first Yumi - Sachiko fic.

* * *

><p>Prologue<p>

Sachiko stared outside the tinted window of her black Mercedes Benz. She usually doesn't need a driver, but today was one of those occasions where she had to attend an event as "Mrs. Ogasawara". She looked momentarily at the handsome young man sitting elegantly beside her before looking back outside again.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this Sa-chan?" Suguru asked, noticing the distant expression his wife had.

Sachiko didn't answer. She had a lot of snide retorts to that question but decided against any of it.

She closed her eyes and heaved a heavy sigh. She had to start conditioning her mind. She may have had years of training on how to mask her true feelings, however, no amount of training can stop her emotions from spilling out. Not when the event she is about to attend is bound to end all hopes she had of fixing things between them.

"Yumi..." she whispered, as memories for years before flooded her mind.

...

"_Is this what you really want?" came her faint voice from the other end of the line._

"_You know from the very beginning that what we had was wrong" she responded a bit strongly than she intended. Yumi should know that it is not a matter of wanting or not wanting. This is something that she had to do – she didn't have a choice._

"_Wrong? We've been doing this for almost a year and now you're telling me that we had was a mistake?"_

"_Do not put words in my mouth, I never said anything about our relationship being a mistake"_

"_Isn't that what you mean? I just want a moment with you Sachiko. This is the only time I have ever demanded time from you..."_

_Sachiko bit her lower lip. How did an argument about Yumi's simple request ended up like this?_

_She knew the reason why Yumi needed her and that it was important for her to be there, but Yumi should also know that the Ogasawara family and business matters is her top priority. She hated saying 'no' to Yumi and hated that she was put in a tight spot wherein she had to choose between her lover and her family. How many times have she denied Yumi of her time? It surely had been difficult for her, just as it was difficult for Sachiko._

"_You know the reason why I can't go out now Yumi"_

_Sachiko breathed in before letting the next words spill out of her mouth "...and you know that sooner or later we had to stop this" _

"_Have you been accustomed to your new life as a married woman?" Yumi responded with a mixture of sadness and disappointment._

"_What are you trying to imply?" came Sachiko's heated retort._

"_Nothing. Then I take it that this is goodbye?"_

_She didn't say anything. She didn't plan on ending things between them, though the very thought has been at the back head every waking day of her life. She dreaded the day when she had to make the hard, selfish decision to end their illicit affair and be the woman her family and the society expected her to be. Sadly, Yumi had to be the sacrifice._

_Is this really the right time? Is there a right time?_

_Maybe fate is presenting her with an opportunity to end her anxiety... only to end her only remaining happiness in the process._

_"For me, everything had been real and right. It may be morally wrong to be with a married woman, yet, it had been my happiest. Because i love you and willingly gave you everything I had despite knowing that one day, everything will end. I know I will never your priority, because I am just me...nothing special. But i guess i have been blinded by my happiness tht I failed to see the signs of you slowly drifting away." _

_Her voice was broken and every word spoken with tears was shattering Sachiko's heart. But she said nothing._

_ She wanted to tell Yumi that she was wrong...she was special. That Sachiko was just too weak to fight against her grandfather's wishes to be married to Suguu. Yumi had been there...in the wedding and the nights thereafter. Finding moments of freedom in her warm embrace only to wake up in the cold dark reality alone. Yumi knew that she needed to leave early before the household awakes and her driver and Suguru were the only ones who knew of their sin. Sachiko hated the arrangement, but always said to herself that they didn't have a choice. __Yumi never complained. She just willingly accepts the few hours Sachiko could spare for her. The Fukuzawas and Touko-chan didn't know anything, because if they did, she knew they will despise what she is doing to Yumi._

_"_Good bye Sachiko" yumi finally said. She waited for a reply...but none came.__

_After a minute of silence, the line went dead and there was a long beeping sound. Sachiko clutched the phone hard, fighting the urge to cry or to call back. But she didn't. And that was the last words they ever exchanged._

...

"We're here" Suguru said, waking Sachiko for her recollection.

She got out of the car and stared at venue entrance in front of her. And with a heavy heart, she walked towards the garden where her old friend and lover is to be wedded.

...

Meanwhile, somewhere in a Bridal tent... "She's here" she whispered.

Touko looked at her onee-sama, "who?"

"You know me too well Touko... You know who I am talking about"

The seours shared a knowing smile, but one was bitterness while the other was with anticipation.

* * *

><p>AN: Let me know your thoughts.


	2. We meet again

Selfish Choices

Disclaimer: I do not own Maria-sama ga miteru or any of its characters. Credits to the author.

A/N: Thanks for the responses to my guests. Here is the first chapter of the story. Cheers!

* * *

><p>Chapter 1: We meet again<p>

It was a garden wedding. Sachiko can see tents set up on the sides. The biggest one is probably for the reception, then the other two were for the bride and groom. And in the middle was where the ceremony is to take place: rows of glass chairs, a red carpet in contrast to the green grass, bouquets of tulips, gerberas, bloodroots, snowdrop anemones and lilacs along the center aisle held together by white vases - all leading to an elegant gazebo completely covered in white lilies where she imagined Yumi and her groom to be standing as they make their vows for eternity.

It was a bright spring morning with big cumulus clouds covering the blue sky, shielding the garden from the sun. Everything was perfect, as if Maria-sama was watching over Yumi even to the day of her wedding. And Sachiko hated it all.

Her thoughts might have been evident on her face because she felt Suguru leaned down and whispered to her ear, "we can still leave if you want".

Sachiko looked up at him and frowned even more, "and why would I want that?"

Suguru shrugged, he was expecting that answer from his wife...denial. "Just suggesting" he began, "because it seems like it's taking every ounce of your energy just being here".

Sachiko gave him a sharp look.

"You know that won't work on me Sa-chan. We've been married for quite some time now and I am used to your temperaments." He sighed. "Anyway, I will be going to the groom's tent to talk to Hiro-san and I think you can head over there" pointing to the white tent at the far left side at the back "to give your greetings to Yumi-chan. I am sure you have a lot to talk about."

"Since when did you know the man?" Sachiko asked with an irritated voice and trying to steer away the conversation away from her and her former lover.

"Don't hate him Sa-chan. He is a good man. He was my junior in Hanadera and if I have to guess, she was one of Yumi-chan's fanboys during her time as Rosa Chinensis or even before. I heard that there were a lot of guys that had on crush on Yumi-chan the first time they saw her at the school festival."

Sachiko's frown deepened. She had her own fair share of fangirls and boys back in high school, and probably until now. But at least she can handle them well. Her cold exterior was more than enough to keep them at a distance, to admire her from afar. However, Yumi was much different from her. To say that Yumi was being nice to them was an understatement. She remembered moments when Yumi was late for their Yamayurikai meeting just because she can't say 'no' to girls wanting to have a chat with her. There was even a time when Yumi was rumoured to have a boyfriend from Hanadera.

...

_Yumi entered the Yamayurikai meeting room with a frown. A very rare occurrence in Sachiko's opinion and it seems like the rest of the girls had the same thought._

_"__What is wrong Yumi-san?" Yoshino asked._

_"__Huh?!" Yumi looked up and was surprised that the whole Yamayurikai was complete and all pairs of eyes were looking at her with concern._

_'__Yumi didn't even notice any of us, I wonder what is in her mind right now?' Sachiko mused._

_Then her face flushed red and gave a deep bow in apology. "I'm sorry I was preoccupied, it slipped my mind that we have a meeting this afternoon"._

_Everybody laughed at her usual antics. _

_"__We understand Yumi-chan. I will also be lost in thought if I receive a bouquet of flowers from an anonymous boy." Rei smirked._

_Yumi blushed even more, if it was possible. "R-r-Rei-sama" Yumi exclaimed._

_Now everybody's eyes were on Rei._

_"__What do you mean Rei?" Sachiko's brow creased._

_"__Oh, you didn't know Sachiko? This morning as my classmate was entering the gate, he saw a boy in a Hanadera High School uniform carrying a bouquet of flowers. She was approached by the boy and was requested to give the flowers to a 2nd year student named Yumi. Of course my classmate knew her because she is Rosa Chinesis en Bouton. But because she was late, she didn't have the chance to give the flowers until lunch break. She had the flowers with her all morning and told the whole class the story about Yumi-chan's secret admirer." Rei finished her story with a smile._

_"__But Rei-chan, I was in Yumi's class and didn't see her carrying any flowers around." Yoshino commented._

_Rei's smile grew bigger and Shimako straightened in her chair in deep thought._

_"__I think Shimako knows the flower's journey" Rei said._

_"__Yes. That explains the rumours about Yumi-san's secret admirer. You see, Misa-san had a bouquet of flowers when she came in to class after lunch. However, she was hurrying because she said she met with her onee-sama and had forgotten about the time. She explained that the flowers were for Yumi-san and as Rei-sama said, it was from a Hanadera student. I think she was only able to give the flowers to Yumi-san after classes. Yoshino-san must have gone ahead of her."_

_"__Umm one-sama" Noriko interjected. "This may also be the reason why Yumi-sama is rumoured to have a boyfriend from Hanadera"_

_"__B-b-boyfriend?" Yumi muttered._

_"__Yes Yumi-sama. You know how these gossips spread" Noriko said._

_"__I haven't heard about it" Touko said._

_"__Because everybody knows that you are Yumi-san's imouto"_

_"__Still...I could have defended Onee-sama and refuted the rumour" Touko huffed._

_Through all this exchange, Sachiko remained quiet. She hated that she didn't know about this incident but hated even more the idea that someone holding the hands of her Yumi. Scenarios of Yumi dating a guy flooded her mind and it enraged her. _

_"__Boyfriend? Who does he think he is?!" _

_Sachiko must have said it out loud because she felt Touko-chan nudged her from the side. "Rosa Chinensis?"_

_She faked a cough and said, "I am happy that Yumi has a suitor, but the fact remains that she is late for the meeting. Make sure not to do it again. You will be Rosa Chinensis in a few months' time and still you cannot handle these matters?"_

_Yumi looked forlorn. "I'm sorry onee-sama" she uttered and sat down on the other side of Sachiko. _

_Sachiko mentally scolded herself. She hated making Yumi feel bad. She knew it was not her imouto's fault and still she reprimanded her knowing that the younger girl easily feels depressed upon knowing that she has caused disappointment to her onee-sama._

_..._

Sachiko turned to look at the direction where Yumi is supposed to be preparing for the ceremony. She missed the Yumi that never left her side. Her beloved imouto that hangs on to every word, follows her every lead and looks at her with adoration. The old Yumi that easily blushes and that hated upsetting her. Until the very end of their relationship, Yumi remained to be unselfish and loving woman that she is.

...

Yumi felt the presence of Sachiko. She didn't expect her to attend her wedding. She chose not to give her an invitation, however, Suguru-san was one of Hiro-san's former seniors in Hanadera and a close one at that. He had to invite him and Yumi chose not to say anything against it. She didn't know how to remove him from the guest list without Hiro-san getting suspicious and she was not ready to reveal anything to him about her previous relationship.

"Onee-sama, is it Sachiko-sama?" Touko peered into her face upon seeing her sigh and asked.

"Yes"

"You weren't expecting this?" she asked.

"No. I knew Hiro-san was inviting Suguru-san and that he would surely come, however, I didn't expect she would come along."

"Still onee-sama, I never thought that your _secret admirer_ in high school will eventually be your husband" Touko said.

"You're right Touko. At first, I was too embarrassed to accept the flowers because I didn't know him. But really, it was not until we were in college that we became friends..."

Yumi's story has come to a stop because Yuuki's head suddenly popped by the entrance of the bridal tent "Touko-san, the coordinator is looking for you".

"It's probably about the souvenirs, tell her I'll be right out" she said to Yuuki before turning back to her onee-sama, "I'll be leaving you in a while onee-sama, but i'll be back to help you with your veil."

"I'll be fine Touko" Yumi smiled reassuringly.

Yumi sat down in front of a make-shift dresser. She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. She was ready. The make-up artist and stylist had done a wonderful job with her and she felt like a princess except for her veil. Touko was supposed to help her fix it before meeting with the coordinator for the last minute concerns. As Yumi's maid of honor, Touko was helping out with a lot with the on-the-day matters. Little things and details that needed to be perfect for her big sister's wedding.

"It can't be helped" she said to herself and smiled at her own reflection.

She was about to pick the flowery pin on the table when she saw a hand took it from her and held it up to her right ear.

"You want this here right?"

She remained seated with her back to her guest and still kept her eyes down. She could feel her heart pounding and her hand starting to tremble.

"You've changed a lot. The old Yumi would have shrieked like a baby dinosaur in surprise by now" she laughed.

Yumi remained motionless. Not sure what she wanted to say or do. It was as if time stopped for her and her breath was caught up in her throat.

_'__Why does she still have this effect on me?_' Yumi asked herself.

The older girl continued to pin her veil to the right place, then picked another pin to put it on the left side. But this time Yumi stopped her by putting her hand gently on hers.

Sachiko stopped momentarily, keeping her nervousness and fears at bay. She was afraid that Yumi will push her away or yell at her, but lucky for her, Yumi just kept still.

Sachiko swallowed hard and kept her act. "Did I do it incorrectly? Do you want it a little higher?" she asked.

_'__Why? Why is she acting too familiar with me?" _Yumi wanted to ask but she couldn't find her voice.

Sachiko put the second pin back down, escaping from Yumi's hold. She was about to fix the first one again when she was once again frozen into place upon seeing a pair of hazel brown eyes reflected in the mirror staring back her.

For a long time, Yumi had never seen Sachiko's face yet for her, it still looked regal and beautiful. She could stare for hours at Sachiko's deep blue eyes and get lost in it.

And suddenly, memories of the moments they shared together rushed through her. Sachiko's sweet melodious laugh that only she was privileged to hear, her striking blue eyes that changes shades with every emotion, her soft gentle touches and the contrasting hard grasps as they made love. But she also remembered the cold lonely nights when she wanted to be with her lover but she can't because of Sachiko's 'duties', the secrets and the lies just to keep their relationship from everyone they cared for and their sad break-up where she didn't have the choice but to accept Sachiko's final decision to end their affair...where she just waited at the other end of the telephone line for any word from her, but no word was spoken...not even goodbye.

...

_"__Yumi?" Yuuki walked up to her as she sat motionless on her bed._

_"__We need to go, dad and mom are waiting for us by the car" Yuuki continued._

_It was the night when Sachiko broke up with her and the night after when Yumi's grandmother died. She called to ask if Sachiko could come with them to the wake, but she ended up enraging Sachiko. She knew that her girlfriend had an important business dinner to attend to, but thought that just this once, Sachiko would be considerate and cancel her previous engagement just to be with Yumi and her family. However, what happened after was beyond anything she had expected._

_Yumi's heart felt like it was about to burst. She wanted to tell Yuuki that he could go ahead and that she will just follow. But try as she might, only soft sobs escaped her lips. She wanted to hide her sadness but she couldn't. _

_Yumi looked up at him with a forced smile. She knew she couldn't fool him and she knew that she could not hide it very well, so she just let the tears fall. She let the phone slip down from her hand and fall to the floor and just wept her heart out._

_"__What happend?!" Yuuki's panicked voice came, but Yumi just kept crying._

...

That night, she wanted to go to the Ogasawara mansion and talk to Sachiko. To see her face and hear from her own lips that she wanted to end everything between them. But she also knew that when Sachiko has made her decision, she will not be able to do anything about it.

And now, as she was looking at the same eyes she wanted to see that night, a myriad of emotions was making it difficult for her to speak.

Sachiko's sudden appearance in her life – especially on the day of her wedding – has surprised her a lot. But the next words that came out of Sachiko's mouth stunned her even more...

Sachiko's eyes softened, her lips curled into a bitter smile and softly said "I missed you."

* * *

><p>AN: Hope to hear your thoughts again. Good night to all.


	3. Different sides of the story

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Maria-sama ga Miteru or any of its characters.

A/N: This chapter in the point of view of the main characters of this fic. Those in italics are recollections of the past or thoughts of the characters.

Not sure if I should have this in separate chapters or one long chapter, obviously, I chose the latter. (just rambling...) Also. I made some minor revisions compared to my update last night. Please read on and enjoy.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2: Different sides of the story<strong>

**Hiro**

Hiro was standing at the end of the red carpet, just as the wedding coordinators have instructed him. The music will start playing soon and he will start walking down the aisle, followed by the entourage, then his to-be wife. They were having a catholic ceremony, just as his Yumi had requested.

He smiled as the face of his beloved flashed in his mind.

His relationship with Yumi-san had not been a very long one, but their year together had been the happiest of times. It hadn't taken him long to realized the he wanted to be with her for the rest of his life. She is the person he will need to stand by his side and support him as he ascend to power and be the next CEO of their family's company.

He had come a long way from when he first saw her...

Hiro coughed to mask the laughter that escaped his lips as he remembered the dare his friends at Hanadera had given him. During his time in high school, Fukuzawa Yumi had many fan boys. It was in their school festival during his second year when he first saw her. He was perplexed why most of his classmates liked her...

"_She looks normal to me" he said nonchalantly._

_One of his friends got irritated "she is not like your fan girls Oda"_

"_Really, I bet you I can make her my girlfriend in no less than 2 weeks" he laughed._

"_And I bet you're all talk and not action"_

"_You just wait" with that final note, he thought of a plan to woo Fukuzawa Yumi and when he has paraded her as a trophy in front of his friends, he will break up with her, just like what he did to his previous girlfriends who wanted nothing but brag that they have him for a boyfriend._

_Hiro himself was popular; he was good looking with an overflowing confidence and the riches to back it up. His family owned a conglomerate, a group of companies, and it was no secret that he is destined to inherit it all being the first born._

_So that one afternoon, he went to Lillian High School to give a bouquet of flowers to the then Rosa Chinensis en bouton (not really understanding why a Catholic girls' school have a weird way of naming their student council officers). He had already been standing by the gate for a couple of minutes, but still no sign of the girl. He became impatient and decided to scrap the idea. On his way back to the bus stop, he saw her. She was crouched on the ground picking up books which appeared to have fallen from friend's bag. He then saw her hand the books back to the other girl before her friend rushed off, leaving her. He got curious and approached her._

"_After helping her, your friend just left you?" he asked._

_She looked at him questioningly._

"_Oh, I am Oda, Oda Hiroyuki. I saw you at Hanadera during our school festival. You're the sister of our Student Council President, right?" he mentally slapped himself, of course the girl would be wary of a stranger like him._

_It was so unlike him, to feel self conscious in front of a girl. If it were one of his fan girls, he would have walked away, thinking that he wouldn't waste his time on girls who don't know his face. He can't explain it himself, but he seemed to have been captivated by her honest brown eyes. Up close, she looked...really cute._

"_I see, then good day to you Oda-san. To answer your question, it's okay for her to leave. She seemed to be running late for something, a club activity probably?" she said thoughtfully._

"_You don't know for certain?"_

"_Sorry no. I just happen to pass by her, she was picking up her things which looks to have fallen due because her back broke or something"_

"_You helped a stranger?" he questioned._

"_Does it matter?"_

_He gave her a questioning look. 'What does she mean by that?' he thought._

"_I mean, it doesn't matter who she is, if she needs help then I will help. It's normal, right?" she said thoughtfully. "Anyway, I'm sorry Oda-san but I need to go" after one final 'good day', she left._

_It was one weird conversation for Hiro. Yet, it made her like the girl. With a smile, he walked back to the gates of Lillian and requested a random girl to give the flowers to Fukuzawa Yumi-san. But this time, he sincerely wanted to give it to her. He felt she was different from the others and for some reason, decided not to see her again._

He was already together with Yumi when he told her about this story. He was expecting her to be angry, for being the subject of a bet among high school guys with nothing better to do. But to his surprise, she just said...

"_You have no idea what kind of rumors spread because of what you did" and they shared a hearty laugh about it._

_It may have been a funny story for Yumi, but to him, it had been more. It has proven just what a beautiful person his wife is, inside and out. _

_..._

His eyes involuntary wandered into the bridal tent. In there, Yumi is dressing up and making herself pretty. And in a few minutes, she will be walking out and the world will see just how lucky he is to have her.

"Getting sentimental now, are we?" he snapped out of his recollection.

"You should be asking that question to yourself Yuuki-san. I am gaining a wife, you're losing a sister" but the soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted it upon seeing a frown appear on his close friend's face.

"Hey, I was only kidding" he immediately added.

Yuuki remained quiet for a moment before saying "you're right"

"Yuuki-san, I said it was only a joke"

"I will be losing a sister" he seriously said and looked at him. "You will be leaving for the US immediately right?"

Hiro forced a smile "you can visit us or we could go home for the holidays"

"Yes you better go back to Japan on holidays. Not seeing her everyday will be a big change for everyone in the family, how much more not seeing her for years?"

Hiro didn't know what to say. He can see the sadness etched in his friend's face and it is for a good reason. Yumi is very close to her family and he is literally stealing her from them. Their decision to leave the country had been made months' before and their families had been informed of this. He will be taking up his masters degree at a business school overseas and will be back probably after 4 or 5 years to run their business. He made sure that he will not leave Japan without marrying Yumi. Long distance relationship was never an option for him because for some reason, he knew there is a risk of losing the girl he loves.

Noticing that Hiro was finding it difficult to respond, Yuuki said "It's fine... I mean, leaving the country after you're married is okay with me, mom and dad. We know that you love her and that you will take care of her. It's just that...we will miss her"

"Thanks brother"

"Stop it! Don't ever call me 'brother' again, it gives me goosebumps" Yuuki said rubbing his arms.

"Why bro? I will be your older brother after this ceremony" Hiro continued to joke and closed the gap between him and Yuuki in an attempt to hug to younger man.

"I said stop it!" Yuuki pushed.

"Hiro-san, Yuuki-san, i hate to break your display of brotherly affection, but the videographer will finish setting up in a few minutes. Yuuki-san, you should join the other secondary sponsors at the back" the coordinator, which is also a friend of theirs, said laughing.

"I will just be checking with Yumi-san after I make sure that the pianist is in position" she said after having another look at her clip board which contains the list of last minute details for the wedding.

When Yuuki was out of sight, Hiro once again looked at the tent and saw Touko-san standing by the entrance of the tent. Why she was not entering yet, he did not know.

That young lady was one fierce body guard.

_..._

_Back in their college days, when he had started to get to know Yumi more, she had always been a very protective younger sister. He was taking a business degree while Yumi was an Architecture student. During their first year, they were classmates in one minor subject. It had taken him a lot of guts to approach her. He was not used to trying to get close to girls, because they usually just flock around him. But Yumi is definitely different and worth all the effort because they eventually became good friends._

_Yumi had been a very refreshing company compared to the usual people from higher society that he deals with everyday. They didn't have similar subjects as they progress through university, but Hiro made sure to find time to still see and talk to Yumi. He was start to fall in love with her, however, he was not able to gather enough courage to confess to her. He tried stirring their conversation about their love life one time, but Yumi obviously tried to avoid the subject and redirect the conversation to other topics._

_It was not until they reached third year when he finally decided to admit his feelings for her. Sadly, she politely declined. This came as no surprise to Hiro, but it still hurt...a lot._

"_I am sorry Hiro-san, but I cannot be in a romantic relationship with you" she said._

"_Why?" he asked._

_Yumi-san had conflicted expression, as if she was carefully choosing the right words "I'm sorry" she quietly answered._

_His pride was deeply hurt, but somehow, he cannot bring himself to be angry at her because from the beginning he felt and knew that she was unattainable. It was not something she has said, it was just a feeling he had that Yumi-san's heart already belonged to someone else. It had been his fault that he got hurt. She never led him on or made him feel that she too has feelings for him._

_..._

"It's time" his mother said, walking up to him.

"Yes mother" he smiled.

However, his smile had been forced because for some reason, he started feeling nervous.

_Is this what they call 'cold feet'?_

"Nervous son?" his father asked.

"Of course not" he responded confidently.

At this, his parents both laughed.

But still, silently he prayed that everything be fine on their wedding...

* * *

><p><strong>Sachiko<strong>

Yumi stood up to face Sachiko, making the older girl take a tentative step back.

Sachiko hands were trembling. She was getting dizzy at the swirl of emotions she was feeling. All her senses had dulled. The sounds outside the bridal tent had been muted and all the wedding effects scattered around her were all a blur...all that mattered was Yumi.

Her heart was pounding so fast with every second of silence that passed. She had imagined the day when she will stand in front of Yumi, asking Yumi to forgive her and accept her once again in her heart. And now that the day has finally come...she was tongue tied.

...

_It was a month after their break-up..._

_Sachiko sighed in relief as she closed yet another business deal. She was enjoying the few minutes she had of being alone in her office before she faces yet another set of documents to prepare for her meeting after lunch. She had her eyes closed and her forehead leaning on her interlaced fingers._

"_Ms. Sachiko, here are the quotations from Dietrich for the Powder Transfer System that the Manufacturing Director discussed with you yesterday" Keiko, her secretary, said as she laid the folder of documents on her boss' table._

"_Also, Suguru-sama dropped by and asked if you would like to have lunch. He said he'll just be in the upper ground floor Cafe until around 11:30" she continued._

_Sachiko opened her eyes and looked at Keiko "tell him i'm not hungry"_

"_But..." Keiko stopped upon seeing Sachiko's cold glare._

"_Yes? You were going to say something?" Sachiko inquired with one eyebrow raised._

_Keiko, in fear, just shook her head "no, I'll tell Suguru-sama the message"_

_As soon as the girl left her room, she sighed again. She turned her chair to marvel at the city view. She knew people envied her, being an executive at such a young age, married to a handsome and well-bred man and possessed all the material things any girl would want. At least that's what the magazines say about her. Her marriage, which took place a year after she graduated from college, was featured in one Japan's news shows and her life had been exposed to the whole country through a magazine interview. In those pages, her beautiful smile has been immortalized. She had perfected a smile that hid all sadness and a mask that concealed all pain. Whenever this comes to mind, she can't help at laugh at the hypocrisy of it all. She had been much happier before she graduated, when she was living a quiet life as a student, away from all the eyes of society and was still with Yumi._

_Yumi didn't go to Lillian, but it was as expected because of what happened between them just before Yumi graduated in high school. However, fate still brought them together, when their paths crossed and eventually became lovers._

_She felt the familiar tightening in her chest as she remembered Yumi once again. This has been a normal occurrence since the break up. She took on most of the business travels that needs to be attended to for the past month to take her mind off of things. After countless deals, meetings and paper works, she would just collapse on her bed at night due to exhaustion. And this is what she wanted, to not have time to think...and feel._

_It had been Suguru-san to first notice that she was losing weight and specifically requested Sachiko's father to not allow Sachiko to travel overseas for a while because of the stress it is causing her, and of course, Touru-sama agreed._

_She had not left the country for over a week and her work load has lessened due to Suguru's efforts. However, contrary to what Suguru thought, he had not helped Sachiko because it only meant that she has more time to think about Yumi. And since then, she had not been sleeping and eating well and she is starting to feel the effects in her body. There were times when she felt like she is about to pass out due to weakness lack of nutrition, but still she fought. She goes to the office everyday as if nothing has changed. _

_Her recollection was momentarily interrupted by the sound of her door being opened forcefully._

"_What is your problem Sachiko!" Suguru yelled. Keiko, who was standing behind Suguru jumped in surprise and hurriedly left the room, never forgetting to close the door behind her._

_Sachiko was shocked. Never has Suguru raised his voice on her, no matter how irritated or angry he is._

"_You're not hungry?!" Suguru shouted again._

"_Oh that. What are you so angry about?" Sachiko inquired, not understanding where his anger is coming from._

"_You haven't eaten anything since this morning, don't you think I wouldn't notice?"_

"_Notice what?"_

_Suguru's voice then softened "something happened between you and Yumi-chan." It was not a question but a statement._

_Sachiko felt another jolt of pain in her chest "it's none of your business". But as she said this, she felt tears starting to well up in her eyes._

"_Slowly killing yourself will not fix things between you two" he said._

"_There's nothing to fix"_

_Suguru stared at her dumbfounded. "That is a lie, Yumi-chan will never leave you. I am sure if you just explain things..."_

"_No. I left her! I broke up with her and..." Sachiko stopped speaking. The weight of her decision is slowly going through her head and she felt that the tears she hadn't cried and the sadness she has hidden are surfacing._

"_Leave!" she shouted. Not wanting to break down in front of Suguru, she asked him to leave. No, only Yumi is allowed to see her like this. Not even her mother or her father or her grandfather and definitely not Suguru. Only Yumi...but Yumi is not..._

"_Leave now!" she shouted again as she leaned down on the table to steady herself._

_The pain was starting to be unbearable and the tears are dangerously close to fall from her eyes. She bowed her head to hide her weakness and her anger. She was angry at herself for what she did but there was no turning back now, she can't just go back to Yumi and ask for her forgiveness. Can she?_

"_Sachiko..."_

"_Please Suguru-san I beg you, just leave me alone" she pleaded._

_Suguru reluctantly left and once again...she was alone._

* * *

><p><strong>Yumi<strong>

Yumi was examining the face of the woman before her. She seemed to be in deep thought, probably organizing her next words.

Yumi waited for a few more seconds before voicing out the nagging question in her head since Sachiko decided to appear before her again.

"Why?" Yumi asked.

Sachiko blinked a few times before visibly swallowing hard. She may have had years of training in hiding her emotions, but to her, she is an open book. Yumi herself on the contrary, had learned how to be more impassive.

She knew her question had been vague. She herself didn't know what that 'why' meant. She wanted to know why Sachiko hadn't called, why she decided to see Yumi just today on her wedding day, why she is acting too familiar with her... there are so many why's. But saying out loud all these would mean that she is still waiting for Sachiko and that she still wants to be with her.

"I tried calling, but it seems that you have changed your number" came Sachiko's meek reply.

"I only changed my number a month after that day" Yumi responded.

...

_It was a month after their break-up..._

"_Onee-sama?" Touko waved her hand in front of Yumi to get her attention. _

_They were in a cafe just outside Yumi's university, hanging out like usual. Since her break-up with Sachiko, Touko always makes sure to visit her at least twice a week or more frequently if her little sister doesn't have exams._

"_Sorry Touko, I was just..."_

"_Waiting for her to call? Again?" Touko said irritated. _

_Yumi didn't respond. She was once again unknowingly staring at her phone, waiting for it ring and hopefully see Sachiko's picture appear on her screen. A text message would have been good too. She didn't want to do it but somehow, she can't feel but still hold on the tiny bit of hope in her heart that Sachiko will call, say sorry and fix things between them. Waiting had indeed been tiring for her. Even at night, she was afraid to sleep and miss a call or message from Sachiko...which eventually didn't come. And she felt like a fool for having too much hope._

_She looked at the frustrating look her imouto was giving her. Until now, she didn't know if she did the right thing and told Touko everything that happened between her and Sachiko, because it did no good for the younger girl. It just made her hate Sachiko and made her worry about her onee-sama. But thinking back at the time, she didn't have any choice. Touko arrived at their house that fateful night, wanting to support her on the death of her grandmother, but all she witnessed was Yumi sitting on the floor of her bedroom, crying her heart out to the clueless Yuuki. _

_..._

"_Onee-sama" Touko whispered._

"_She left me" Yumi said in between sobs._

_Both Yuuki and Touko understood. Neither knew what she was exactly talking about, but somehow they understood._

_Yuuki's expression darkened, "Now? Of all times, she left you now?"_

_At this, Yumi cried harder. Touko then requested for Yuuki to leave and let her handle her onee-sama alone. Unwillingly, Yuuki left._

_Touko hugged her and let her cry until she eventually fell asleep due to exhaustion – both physically and emotionally. She woke up a few hours after and found Touko still by her side, just watching her. It was then when she told her everything. And after the burial, she also confessed everything to Yoshino-san, who had been her best friend even after they graduated from high school._

_..._

"_Really onee-sama, aren't you tired of waiting?" Touko asked, breaking her train of thought._

"_I am" she finally said. She then removed her sim card, snapped it in half, stood up and threw it in the trash bin._

"_There. Now I am sure there is nothing I need to wait for" she said proudly._

_Instead of a happy smile she was expecting to receive from Touko, the younger girl furrowed her brow and gave her a worried look._

"_Onee-sama..."_

_..._

Fate may have been on their side the first time they reconciled and became lovers, but not this time. Sachiko might have called after she removed her sim card. To her, it just seemed like a huge irony that the call she had been waiting for a whole month only came a fraction of second too late.

"I asked Touko-chan and Yoshino-chan for your contact number, but... they wouldn't give it to me. I also went to your house, but Yuuki-kun wouldn't even talk to me. I tried Yumi, believe me"

Yumi didn't hear anything about Sachiko's attempt to see or contact her from her brother and friends. But nothing really matters now, because in a few minutes time, she is to be wedded to the man that loved her and never left side.

"Please Yumi..." Sachiko's eyes were brimming with tears. For a woman filled with pride and confidence, it was a very rare sight to see her look this pitiful. Yumi may have hated Sachiko for everything she has done to her two years ago, but somehow seeing her plead just makes Yumi's resolve waver.

"Yumi please...I have realized what I did wrong and I swear I have changed" Sachiko said closing the distance between them.

"I'm sorry" Sachiko looked deep into her eyes and said. Yumi felt her sincerity and it scared her.

Yumi side stepped and walked around Sachiko towards the exit. If she doesn't leave now, she was afraid that her heart will melt and she may possibly accept Sachiko's apology. She knew that despite everything, she still has some feelings for her. How could she not? She has loved Sachiko for a good part of her life.

She shook her head.

"No."

It was more like she was convincing herself rather than a response to Sachiko's plea.

Not now, not when his groom is waiting for her outside. She then looked at the exit in a desperate attempt to run away from Sachiko and her confused feelings when next to the door, she saw Touko.

Sachiko seem to have seen Touko as well because she tried to compose herself, even by just a little. She knew Sachiko hated showing weakness in front of others.

"Yumi..." in a quieter voice, she called her name and extended her hand, asking her to take it.

With a soft controlled voice Sachiko said, "I will divorce Suguru, tell everything to mother and father...we will not hide anymore..."

Only Yumi could tell that Sachiko's voice was trembling slightly and that she was trying hard to stop herself from going through an emotional outburst. She was good at keeping her composure, but not to the knowing eyes of Yumi.

Sachiko begged once again "Please..."

Yumi held the fabric on her chest, as if wanting to clutch her madly beating heart.

Sachiko took a few steps closer to her, still reaching out to Yumi and waiting for the other woman to take her hand.

Their eyes locked, and for a moment she had wanted to take Sachiko's offer until...

"Yumi-san, we're ready for you now. The entourage and the groom are already in position" their coordinator spoke without looking up at her clipboard. Her sudden appearance caused both girls to mildly jump in surprise.

"Yes, I'll be right out" Yumi responded. And without taking her eyes off of the older woman, she shook her head.

Sachiko's eyes widened in panic. But she didn't dare say or do anything in front of a stranger, her upbringing forbade her to do so.

This gave Yumi a chance to leave. She grabbed Touko's hand as she passed her by the door and literally dragged her away from the bridal tent. After a few paces, she stopped walking, turned to face Touko and buried her face in her petite seour's neck.

* * *

><p>AN: Thanks for reading. Magandang Gabi.


	4. Still in love with you

**SELFISH CHOICES**

* * *

><p>Disclaimer: I don't own Maria-Sama Ga Miteru or any of its characters. Credits to the author.<p>

A/N: Thanks for the reviews because it really urges me to continue with this story.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3: Still in love with you<strong>

Yumi hugged Touko, trying to calm her swirling thoughts and emotions.

"Onee-sama" came Touko's meek voice.

"I'm fine" she responded as she slowly lift her head. Good thing her make-up had been water proof. The make-up artist anticipated that this will be an tear-filled day for Yumi and in a way, she had been right.

"For a moment there, I thought..." Touko trailed off.

Yumi smiled at her petite seour as she gently cupped her cheeks, "yes Touko, for a second there I could have said 'yes'..."

Yumi turned to where the wedding ceremony is to take place. Her eyes scanned the guests, their family and friends all present on her big day, until her eyes settled to the end of the red carpet where Hiro-san was standing, seemingly nervous. And despite the distance, she can tell and feel the anxiousness of her groom.

"...but then I saw you and as I recalled the face of Hiro-san...it made me realize that I made promises. And today, all those promises are meant to be fulfilled.

Touko looked at her questioningly. To Yumi, she looked adorable with her head tilted to the side. Years have gone by and her little sister is already on her way to become a doctor, but still, to Yumi, Touko remains to be the lovable petite seour she chose way back in high school.

"I promised you that I will always choose my happiness. Before, I had a bad habit of always considering other people's feelings first and it had been difficult for me to say 'no' to any request, but you reprimanded me for it." Yumi let out a laugh at the memory of a younger Touko scolding her for being too nice.

"You were seriously considering saying 'yes' to Sachiko-sama?" Touko looked surprised.

Yumi nodded yes, "she rarely apologizes and never begs..."

"But what will happen after that. You say 'yes' because of pity and then you go back to being her..." Touko stopped, not bearing to say the word 'mistress'.

Yumi nodded again. "That is why I had to thank you my cute little petite seour, because I remembered your words and realized that agreeing with her now and leaving everything behind again is not what's best for me and the people that I love"

Touko blushed at the way her onee-sama addressed her.

"Also, I promised Hiro-san that on this day, I will marry him and start a happy life with him. I swore that I will never leave his side despite all the hardships that we have faced and will surely encounter in the future. And this is just one of them" as Yumi said this, she looked back at the bridal tent.

"I love him Touko", she continued, "and I know he truly loves me too. Sachiko is just a part of my past."

"But you still love her?" Touko asked. She had wanted to ask this question the moment she saw the look on her onee-sama's face. She saw that somehow, the older girl still have feelings for Sachiko-sama and she got scared. She was really frightened at the thought of Yumi-sama leaving every good thing behind and going back into Sachiko's arms. The young heiress did make promises, but whether it had been sincere or just out of desperation, she didn't know. All she knew was that she had to protect her grande seour from going through that painful experience again.

"A part of me still do" Yumi smiled bitterly, "but I have long accepted the fact that we can never be together and it has helped me move on. And with a supporting younger sister always by my side..." she gave Touko her sweetest smile "...I learned to love myself more and look for my own happiness"

With her onee-sama's words, Touko's fears slowly drifted away.

"Before, I lost myself in fear of losing Sachiko. I threw away everything believing that having her in my life is all I needed. How wrong I had been. But with Hiro-san, I can be myself and I know he will still love me for it."

Yumi smiled to herself and looked up at the clear blue skies. She closed her eyes and felt the gentle breeze on her face.

She knew she can smile now because she had just overcome a hurdle. She had feared the day that they will meet again. She was afraid that Sachiko will make her heart sway...and for a moment it did.

But now, instead of fear, she feels happiness and contentment. She had made peace with the part of her heart that loved Sachiko. So she knew, when the time comes that she has to make a decision again between Sachiko and Hiro-san, without a second thought, she knew she will confidently choose Hiro-san.

With this in mind, she walked slowly towards her wedding and to her future life.

* * *

><p>...<p>

Sachiko stood rooted on the spot. She can run after Yumi, she feels that the younger girl still has feelings for her and she tried harder, Yumi might say 'yes', but her feet seems dead and doesn't want to move.

As the events that transpired rushed through her head in blur, her knees weakened. She was about to fall to the ground when strong arms held her up.

"Suguru-san"

The man saw Yumi-chan and Touko-chan come out of the tent and realized that Sachiko needed him. It may be true that she can never love Sachiko as husband loves a wife, but the fact remains that he still loves and cares for her.

He can see the tears welling up from her eyes and the shaking of her hands and knees, so he held on to her. She will surely scold him later on, but he didn't care. Sachiko may have a sharp tongue and a dominant personality, but he knew that she is emotionally and physically weak. Something that Sachiko will never admit to him.

Sachiko didn't say anything about why she had agreed to go to this wedding, but Suguru had an idea. He knew her too well to think that his wife only wanted attend the wedding for formality's sake. She had seen the determined look in her eyes earlier on and knew that she will try to get her Yumi-chan back.

Suguru had hoped the younger girl will consider, despite today being her wedding day. But he also knew that the possibility of Sachiko succeeding had been very slim. He had tried persuading her to just turn back and not come to the wedding, but she had set her mind to the task at hand. And now that she has come crashing back down, no one can pick her up but him. The affair had been hidden from the eyes of everyone even to their own families and close friends. He knew Sachiko would not reveal anything to anyone so he took it upon himself to help her.

"Let go" came Sachiko voice.

Suguru looked down at his wife and saw that she had somehow composed herself, even by just a little. She was still breathing deeply, trying to calm herself. She was gently pushing him away.

"I take it Yumi-chan..."

She sharply turned her head and gave him a threatening look, "don't even think about saying anything..."

And with her head held high, she walked out of the tent with Suguru trailing behind her.

"I'm going on ahead"

"I can come home with you. Hiro-san has seen me, there's no reason for me to stay. It's not like he will account his guests and get angry at those that didn't attend" Suguru said trying to lighten up the mood.

"No. I want to be alone."

It wasn't a surprise that she would decline, but still frustrating. Suguru sighed. He hated it when Sachiko tries to bottle up everything. He has assured her again and again that they are partners, friends, and that she can rely on him. But she never does.

"Okay, I'll walk you out then" he said and tried to take her arm and be a gentleman to escort her to the car.

Sachiko seems to still be a little shaken due to the incident and didn't argue. So with her hand in his arm, they walked out. He had made preparations for the departure.

Sachiko still looks pensive as they approached the black sedan. Suguru opened the door for her and as he ushered her in, he whispered in her ear, "I understand that you want to handle this on your own Sachiko, but please consider that there are people who are worried about you. You need to stop blaming yourself and free yourself from all the sadness and pain."

Sachiko looked at him blankly, her mind still in her own little world as she sat down.

Suguru smiled at the other person already sitting at the back of the car, "I leave her in your care" he said before closing the door.

"Sachiko?" it was Youko.

Sachiko turned upon hearing the familiar voice. It took a moment for her mind to register her surroundings and at the realization that it was her onee-sama, the dam broke and all her emotions and tears started to come out. She buried her face in her arms and wept like a child.

Youko just held her close and embraced her. It had been pure coincidence that she arrived late because she pulled an overnighter for a case. She had very little sleep and had forgotten to put on make-up. She went to the ladies room to doll herself up and on her way out, she bumped into Suguru-san.

Youko had gotten to like the man a little upon seeing that he really cares for Sachiko. She knows how difficult it is to handle her sister, but somehow, the man was able to deal with her whims and hysterics.

Since he has married into the Ogasawara family and moved into their family home, she had stopped calling him 'Kashiwagi-san' and it doesn't sound right to call him 'Ogasawara-san' either, so she settled with calling him by his first name.

...

"_Suguru-san?"_

"_I really don't understand why girls spend ages in the restroom" he said smugly._

"_Still a bitch I see" Youko responded with contempt._

"'_Long time no see' to you too Youko-san. I'm glad being a lawyer had increased your vocabulary"_

"_Shut up" she huffed. She wanted to walk away from him that instant but she didn't. It seems like the man had been waiting for her because he needs something, and that it surely concerns her petite seour._

_Seeing that Youko is stopping herself from storming off, he smiled. The girl is as perceptive as ever. "Sachiko needs you" he said._

"_But she has you for a husband" Youko replied._

_Suguru laughed. "Really? She doesn't seem to realize that."_

"_Probably because you're a jerk most of the time" Youko retorted._

"_What a fickle woman, one moment you're praising me then not a second has passed and you're criticizing?" Suguru said jokingly._

"_I said stop it with the jokes and tell me what's wrong with Sachiko"_

_At this, Suguru's face turned serious. "I am not sure what she has told you, so it would be best to hear it directly from her"_

"_I don't..." _

_Suguru suddenly cuts her off, "...I will be bringing Sachiko to the car in front of this venue in around 10 minutes. I have already instructed the driver to take her somewhere. Can you please wait for her in the car?"_

_Youko doesn't know what Suguru is talking about, but one thing was clear, her petite seour needed her and the problem seems to be serious if the proud Suguru has resorted to asking for her help. _

_She had wanted to attend the wedding and see Yumi-chan get married, but right now, Sachiko is more important. So she sent a text message to Sei that she needs to leave due to some urgent concerns._

_As she walks towards the entrance, she saw a chauffeur standing beside a black Benz. The old man knew her, he bowed and greeted "Mizuno-sama"._

_She gave a curt bow to the man and seated herself at the back of the car._

_..._

The driver was instructed to go to Lillian and as the familiar scene appeared before Youko, she can't help but feel nostalgic. Her gaze drifted onto the face of her imouto. She has stopped crying and has settled her head on Youko's lap.

The old man pulled over the side of the Lillian High School, shut off the engine and got out of the car. He paused for a moment before closing the door, looked to Youko and told her that he will just be outside. Youko smiled politely "thank you", she said.

"Sachiko?" Youko spoke as she gently caressed her hair.

They haven't seen each other in a long time, but they catch up once in a while through phone calls or text messages. The connection they share is still there, but Sachiko has become distant 2 or 3 years ago. Youko blamed it to distance and time, thinking that it is only the natural order of things. However, now, looking at her distraught younger sister, she can't help but feel bad that she didn't exert much effort to keep their relationship closer. Sachiko seemed to have been suffering for some time and she had been too far away to ever notice that her beloved petite seour needed her.

Sachiko's hair is shorter, only a few inches from her shoulder. Her face still looked beautiful but more mature. However, her eyes were much different than before. It's now lifeless and empty, and this broke her heart.

"It was Suguru, wasn't it?" Sachiko's voice was still hoarse from crying too much.

"Yes. He seems to be your guardian angel now."

She felt Sachiko shake a little in mirth, "we haven't seen each other for a long time onee-sama, I never thought you can pull those kind of jokes now" Sachiko said sitting up.

Youko feigned hurt, "really Sachiko, you wound me" she said.

"So, how have you been?" Youko asked, still unsure of how to start the conversation. She can see the hesitation in Sachiko before her imouto turned her gaze at the familiar path of Lillian High School.

"Onee-sama, I missed you" she said.

"I missed you too Sachiko, but I have a feeling that your tears a while ago were not because you just missed your dear onee-sama"

There was silence. And Youko let the younger woman organize her thoughts.

"I made a huge mistake onee-sama" she said, still looking out the window and away from Youko. "And I'm afraid there is nothing I can do to make amends" Sachiko is having a difficult time to speak as sobs threaten to escape her lips again.

Youko reached out and took her hand making Sachiko turn her swollen eyes to look at her onee-sama. "Whatever it is, I am here for you" Youko said.

"Even if I committed a sin that even Maria-sama could not forgive?" Sachiko asked.

Youko's expression remained neutral. A poker face she has mastered through her trials and court cases. She still couldn't understand where Sachiko is coming from.

"I committed adultery onee-sama" Sachiko continued. "I hated what father and grandfather was doing before, only to find out that I will be walking the same path as them."

"Sachiko..." Youko looked at the other woman sympathetically. She knew how sensitive this topic is to Sachiko and hearing that she herself committed the same sin, just made matters worse.

Sachiko swallowed hard to push back the lump in her throat. She has to tell Youko-sama everything. She hated a lot of things about her husband, but one of the reasons she remained with him is because he cares for her and because he know her so well. And seeing Youko-sama in front of her now just made her all the more thankful of Suguru's efforts to help her out. The only things left is to break down her walls and bare her heart to a trusted friend.

She took a deep breath and started telling her story. About how she and Yumi drifted apart after high school...how they met on coincidence, accepted their feelings and eventually became a couple...how Yumi broke up with her when she decided to follow her family's wishes and marry Suguru.

Youko had been a good listener the whole time, just nodding her head or stroking her hand. When it becomes difficult for her to speak, she urges her on and gives her a comforting smile.

"But Yumi-chan had been at your wedding Sachiko and she seems fine" Youko said.

"Yes, but then she left at the part where we say our vows"

Of course Sachiko knew. The whole wedding ceremony, her eyes had been on Yumi. In her head, she was pretending that it had been Yumi, standing before her and holding her hand, not Suguru. She had gotten through the whole charade of a wedding because of an illusion that she was marrying her beloved Yumi.

Youko thought for a moment before she remembered, "Yoshino-chan asked Yumi to accompany her at the bathroom that time. Yoshino-chan must have understood how Yumi-chan felt..."

Sachiko paused for a moment and leaned back on the car seat. Retelling her story is exhausting, but she is slowly feeling the weight on her chest lighten. The next part is going to be even more difficult so she rest for a while and organized her thoughts.

She clearly remembers everything about Yumi. How could she not? After the wedding, those cherished moments had been few, but it were the only happy times she had. Yet, it had likewise been difficult for both of them because of the awareness of their sin.

_..._

_Sachiko laid down on her bed. She just arrived from the office and was physically and mentally exhausted at all the things she needed to learn to run their business._

_Gentle small hands massaged her tired legs and her whole body relaxed._

"_Suguru-san called, saying that you will require my services tonight" Yumi joked, "though I still wish that it was me who is always at your side and not him"._

_Sachiko sat up and looked at Yumi in the eyes, "me too Yumi" she said with all the love she has for the other woman. She brought her face closer to her and kissed her._

"_I love you Yumi" she whispered._

"_I love you too Sa.."_

"_Sachiko" a voice came followed by a knock on her door. It was her mother._

"_Y-yes mother?" she responded, pulling her body away from Yumi._

"_I just noticed your car arrived. Your grandfather wants to have a word with you and Suguru-san."_

"_I'm sorry, I didn't know you're still awake, I could have dropped by the study to give my greetings" Sachiko said. "I am just changing my clothes mother, I will go down to eat when I'm done."_

_Her mother agreed and left._

_Sachiko let out a sigh of relief. She then saw Yumi walk away to pick up her bag on the couch, "I'll see you another time" she said with a smile._

_But despite the smile on her lover's face, she can see the hurt. Sachiko knew that all the secrecy is hurting Yumi, but they both knew there was no other way._

...

"What happened to Yumi-chan after the wedding" Youko said, seeing the distant expression on her petite seour's face.

Sachiko sat up straighter once again, readied herself and continued with her story.

"After the wedding, Yumi stopped seeing me. She wouldn't even answer my calls or messages. I-...my life just stopped..."

Sachiko stopped speaking. She really cannot recall what happened a few days after the wedding. It had been Suguru who told her, after much persuasion.

"Suguru-san told me I had been hospitalized..." Sachiko said in deep thought.

"You had an emotional break down and you stopped eating" Youko said in a quiet voice.

"I think so" came Sachiko's distant reply.

"You really have to think about the people that worry about you Sachiko" Youko said, gently reprimanding her younger sister.

"Yes onee-sama" came the usual reply. It was exactly as Suguru-san said.

"Then one day, Yumi came to visit me in the hospital..."

...

"_I need you Yumi..." in the middle of all her distress, Sachiko said reaching out to touch the younger girl._

_Yumi walked closer to her hospital bed and took her hand._

"_I need you back in my life Yumi..." she said again._

_Yumi nodded 'yes'... and that's when the lies began._

...

"I know I have been hurting Yumi, but I had been hurting as well onee-sama. I wanted to tell everyone how much I love her and how much I want to be with her, but how could I when all eyes are on me? I represent the future of the Ogasawara business where thousand of lives of our employees depended on. If a word comes out that I am having an affair with a woman, how do you think it would affect the business. If we close down, what will happen to our employees and their families?"

Sachiko seems to be convincing herself more than Youko and the older woman knew this.

"But how about your own happiness Sachiko?"

"I didn't have the luxury to indulge myself onee-sama"

"Who told you this?" Youko asked.

It had been her grandfather. Since she was young, she was made aware of all these realities and the sacrifices she has to make, even at the expense of her own happiness.

"I know onee-sama. That is why I made a decision a while back to divorce Suguru-san and be with Yumi" and as she said this, she appeared braver. Her eyes shown and a hint of strong emotion flickered through her eyes.

Youko stared hard at her imouto, unbelieving that she had the courage to take on this big decision that will go against everything Sachiko has learned since she was young. However, something could have gone wrong along the way because if not, then Yumi-chan will not be getting married to someone else.

"Something happened that day..." Youko said.

"Yes. I was about to tell Suguru to ask for his help in dissolving our marriage. I could not bear to look at Yumi hurting like that, so I need to face my own fears and fight for us. He agreed to go with me in facing our grandfather, but as we reach the door of his study, I heard him talking to father. He was asking him why I haven't conceived yet despite being married to Suguru for a year. He was threatening to take away father's position and money if he doesn't do anything. He then scolded mother at how useless she is for not properly teaching me the importance of having an heir."

As Sachiko said this, tears start to fall from her eyes once again. It had been a very painful memory for her. She wants to fight for her happiness, but at the same time, she can't bear to watch her father and mother being treated that way because of her.

"So you break up with Yumi-chan?"

"Yes. It had been painful enough for both of us, imagine how much more if Yumi finds out that I am bearing Suguru's child?"

Youko squeezed Sachiko's hand hoping to ease her pain even by just a little.

"I had to do it onee-sama, I just can't. I have delayed telling the truth to Yumi because I can't imagine a life without her. So when an opportunity presented itself, I took it..."

Sachiko cried harder.

"But it had been another big mistake, because I know Yumi's grandmother has just died and yet I chose to break up with her that night. I thought, the more Yumi hated me, the easier it will be for her to move on and forget about me. I was not able to consider how distraught she would be."

She continued to sob, but still forced to finished her story.

"But after the break-up, I still could not do it with Suguru. I just spoke with grandfather and told him that I want to understand everything about the business before thinking of having a child. It seems like it greatly pleased him to have me and Suguru heavily involved in the business, so I got him to agree."

"So you worked yourself to the ground just to move on?" Youko knew her imouto well. It's just like Sachiko to focus on one thing and direct all her energy on a specific task so she wouldn't have time to think and feel. But Youko also knew that it had bad effects on Sachiko's health. She most likely forgot to eat and was overworked until the point came where Suguru or her parents had to stop her.

Sachiko looked at her onee-sama with her tear-stained face, "but it didn't work onee-sama. Two years have passed and I still feel incomplete"

Youko pulled her close and hugged her.

"I tried onee-sama, I asked her to forgive me and to reconsider being with me, but she declined... I-i..." Youko shushed her, not wanting to hear anymore. After that, no words were spoken and she continued to sob Youko's arms.

* * *

><p>AN: Hope to hear your thoughts.


End file.
